Saturday, October 13, 2012

It was a normal day until...

You don't have to read thick books or meeting famous people to be inspired. Talking to a random people who sit next to you in the bus on a normal day can change your life forever. Yesterday was my another normal Friday. I finished my class at 2 p.m and headed to city right after the class to have a proper lunch with the girls. Then a friend told me to be strong . She told me a 'story'. Unforgivable,I would say. I wished no one told me.

"Hold on, Nabilah. It's Friday. " I told myself.

Then, I walked alone to a bus stand after watching Taken 2 ( which I think Taken 1 is wayyyy better than Taken 2) with the 'unforgivable' thing in my head.

How can a friend do this to a friend? In what sense it is alright to do this to your friend? If you think you don't deserves this, on what basis you think I deserve this?

Those are questions that I had in my mind on my way to the bus stand. Walking alone and thinking like my other normal days here and that very moment,I decided  not to forgive the person. Silly me.

At the bus stand,

"Do you know which bus is going to the hospital?"
"27B. I'm waiting for the bus too."

After a while,

"You are not from here?"
"No." I reluctantly answered.
"You just came back from town?"
"yes." I was carrying bananas in my hands. "and you must come from the airport?" I saw his luggage with the airport tags on it.
"yes. I just got back from Istanbul."
"Istanbul. oh, wow.haha. I'm sorry, I just watched  a movie and the setting is in Istanbul."
"yeah... they made us look bad as Muslims."
"oh, are you a Muslim?"
"Alhamdulillah, I'm a Muslim."
"Are you from here?"
"I was born here, I've been living here, I'm a pure Irish and a Muslim." He laughed.

On the bus, I sat next to him. He told me how he converted to Islam. His wife died because of bone cancer 10 years ago. A week after his wife died, his one and only son has been diagnosed with leukemia (his son is still on chemotherapy) At the same time, his business partner who was also his very own best friend cheated his money and run away. I forgot the part how he decided to go to Turkey. I'm a bit forgetful nowadays. -.-' In Istanbul, he met an Imam. They had a cup of chai somewhere in front of Blue Mosque ( his Irish accent is too thick but i think he said blue mosque,though). The Imam told him about God's existence, uluhiyyat ( he did use 'uluhiyyat' which i'm impressed because not all people know this term) and tauhid. He read Alquran and tried to understand it for months. Then he went back to Turkey to come back to his fitrah which is Islam.

"I can't stop reading Al-Quran. Every sentence gives impacts to me, you know."

Then, he stopped talking.  Being me, I always awkward when I have to start a conversation with people but I still want to know his story. heh.

"So, how about your business?
"I started a new business in last 3 years. Alhamdulillah, it's good."
"What happened to your business partner now? You didn't meet him at all after that?"
"No. Last 2 years, I met his brother and asked about him but we didn't really meet."
"Do you forgive him? He's your best friend, but he left you with your money. He was supposed to be with you when you're sad, you know?"
"Emmmm... yeah.. I forgave him long time ago. He did a mistake. Everyone did.We grew up together. He used to make me smile and teach me many things. We had our good times together. Everyone deserves a second chance. hahaha."

He laughed while kept looking at a small book in his hand which later I found out, it is a small, old English-Translated Alquran.

"How do you do that?"
"What? forgive him?"
"Yes. Like how?!" That time, I just want to know how he could forgive and forget. Forget everything! I have my own issue with this,you know.
"Well...look, young lady. Forgiving someone will give you inner peace that you can't find anywhere else. We want God to forgive our sins. Why can't we forgive another human's mistakes to us?"  He laughed.  I guessed, he just love laughing but on the second thought, he laughed because he's happy and grateful for what he has now. I can tell this because I could see he's smiling all the times and.....ah, I don't know how to explain. You guys should meet him! (Wait, what??)

We stopped talking after I missed one stop. -___-'So, I had to walk in cold for another 10 minutes to my house and then, I decided to forgive.

Like Abah always says, when you have a true intention to be  a better person or Muslim, Allah will send good people to you. The moment when I decided not to forgive someone's mistake to me, Allah brought me to this one random, old , amazing man who had more challenging life. Memaafkan orang itu susah tapi ianya semulia-mulia perbuatan. I'm not saying I'm a good person. Jauh lagi, tapi kita kena ada azam untuk menjadi orang yang lebih baik daripasa semalam,no?

Yes, we wish we can have a delete button or whatever we want to call it just to remove someone from our lives ( I always see people tweet about this -.-'.)but don't you realize without that person, you won't be you now? He/ She used to make you smile not so long ago. Then, what happened  to those good memories, laughter, smiles and hidden jokes and food that we used to share?
(and I actually miss all those things)

 I decided not to live in sadness of hatred. How about you?

p.s: Thanks for the emails about depression. You guys are another random people that inspired me too.Let's fight it together. ecewahh!


Aunty Za said...

nabilah, aunty suka sangat apa yang nabilah tulis lately. you grow stronger, sayang. take care, ok?

latt said...

You might not realize, but just by reading this; it's like a life-changing moment for me. Thanks :)

NA said...

Aunty Za: Thank you, aunty. you, take care too! ;)

latt: Thanks for reading. just look for His signs. He always with us. :)

D said...

I randomly google and found your blog 2 weeks ago and I read it since then. I love your writings. so honest and sometimes, you can be so funny. I'm not a muslim myself, but this particular entry really touched me.


NA said...


Thanks. I write to express my feelings. so, i can be too honest sometimes. doesnt matter if we are muslim or not, all of us want to be a better person today than ourselves, yesterday. :)

thanks, again.