Friday, September 18, 2015

For two

When I was doing my Obs and Gynae rotation last year,  when my patients answer "busy with pregnancy" whenever I ask what her job is (it is a part of social history and to know if she will get enough maternity leave or not), I always wonder what is so busy with pregnancy?! Your baby will grow in your uterus for 9 months on their own, anyway. daa!
Now, I eat my own words. Pregnancy is busy and tiring. No doubt about that. When I told my mother that I want to start working as soon as possible since some of my friends were pregnant when they were in medical school and they managed to do it fabulously, she said, " Do not overestimate what your body can do. You are going to work as a junior doctor not a student anymore. Chill, boleh?" hahaha. Mom is always right! The first 3 months, I was so busy with morning sickness. It was not severe but seriously the term of 'morning sickness' should be changed to 'all the times sickness'.  You have no idea when it is going to start and when it is going to stop. I'm just glad that it was not severe enough that I need to be admitted to hospital for  IV fluid or anything. Then things are not going to get better for 2nd trimester. More frequent visits to clinic and only God knows how long it takes for each visit. I certainly understand  why some mothers are very reluctant to attend their check up every month ( then every two weeks and every week until you deliver your baby). Not to mention about heartburn, backache, nausea, fatigue ( I feel tired all the times now), and no position is comfortable to sleep. A good night sleep is almost impossible for me now.
Everything I do now, I must think that I do it for two, I eat for two and I think for two. Last week I was craving for tom yam instant noodle but I had to resist it since it is just not good for my baby. All the food that I need to cook nowadays must contain all the nutritious ingredients and organic (we try to have organic veggies in our fridge all the times but to be honest they are so expensive). All of these, they take effort, time and energy. I would say pregnancy is a job that no one can prepare you for that. It is a big responsibility and of course you want to give the best for your baby.

Apart from all of that, I'm very glad to be given this opportunity from Allah to experience this. I'm almost 6 months now and I want to seize every moment of this journey. I almost cried when I can feel my first baby kick ( my pregnancy hormones make me wanna cry for no reasons sometimes). I was listening to Beethoven music when I can feel my baby's first kick. Nothing can be more exciting than that. And the shopping part, God I love it. Heh. Decorating our first nursery room is another fun task. heee!

Alhamdulillah for everything. May Allah ease everything. :)

Thursday, September 10, 2015

A gift

Things can get rough
Road is not always smooth
Friends come and go
World is like sugar 
easily to crumble
but you always there to remind me
to taste its sweetness.
I might not say ' I love you' enough
but you are there to love me when things get tough.

Husband, you are a gift from God.

Monday, September 7, 2015


Injustice ;

When you keep telling people
how much you love to help other people,
how big is your heart to help those Palestinian kids,
and how much you hate injustice in this world,
have you ever thought that ;
whenever you talk about me to
your friends for the sake of i-love-sharing-my-problems-it-is-just-me,
you actually do some injustice to me (another person in this world)?
because they only hear one side of story.
By doing that, you are more or less like Israel who wants
world to know one side of agony.

Ps: 'mengumpat' is the best way to describe it.

Tuesday, September 1, 2015



When two souls fall in love, there is nothing else but the yearning to be close to the other. The presence that is felt through a hand held, a voice heard, or a smile seen.

Souls do not have calendar or clocks, nor do the understand the notion of time or distance. The only know it feels right to be with one another.

This is the reason why you miss someone so much when they are not there-even they are only in the next room. Your soul only realise their absence- it doesn't realise the separation is temporary.

Can i ask you something?
Why is it every time we say goodnight, it feels like goodbye?
-Lang Leav